So I have been dealing with and talking to people about the whole Christian dating/relationship concept. I went to a few people, and got to hear their say on it. And here are some points you might want to think about before entering a relationship. (Special thanks to Ashley, John and Reeja for contributing their ideas. )
-The more people you date and attach yourself with before finding the one God has destined for you (not just physically but emotionally also), the less you will have to give to the person you end up with in the future.
-When entering any relationship both sides must be able to contribute to the relationship the time and attention it deserves. Relationships are draining, and require allot of energy. If you can’t afford to give the time and energy it is probability best to just wait.
-Before entering into any relationship plan out what your priorities and goals are at the present moment. Maybe you are a student, maybe you are working. And assuming you are a Christian, your number one priority is God. What ever the situation make sure that this relationship will benefit you when it comes to your priorities and goals. If you know a relationship will hold you back or move you away from your goals or priorities, it is probably best not to enter into it.
-Christians really shouldn’t date for the sake of dating, or just for the fun of it. True Christian dating should always be approached by looking at in the sense of what this relationship could lead to in the future. What I mean is, if you can’t see yourself marrying the person one day, why are you dating them?
-And since you do look at things in the long term, might want to evaluate your own age and how close you are to even thinking about marriage. If you’re in your late teens, you still have a few years before you even think about marriage. So getting into a relationship at that age would mean you are saying you want a long term thing. For example, you start to date at 19 and you would like to get married around lets say 25. That would mean you are looking at possibly a 5 year relationship with this person. Long term dating can really be dangerous. A few things happen in long term relationships. 1 if the relationship breaks off, both sides usually end up hurt more since long term dating usually leads to some emotional attachment. 2 the longer a relationship the more willing you are to compromise your own needs or wants in order to keep the relationship going. You will be less willing to break off the relationship even if you find out this person is not the one for you mainly because the relationship has been going on for so long. So if you do chose to date at a young age, do it with caution and always guard your heart.
So here you go, you might not agree with all of this, and I know there are allot of other things to consider, but these are just a few. Just always remember to GUARD YOUR HEART
God is love -Reny
7 comments:
Very informative and true. Great post!
Most importantly, people shouldn't date because they will all get pregnant and most likely die. Men included. =P
I really like this....especially the first point that was made..I don't think that is something that everyone thinks about while starting a relationship.. but I think it's so true and a very important point.
Really nice, well thought out post. Great idea to have a place to discuss Christianity. I really believe that faith shouldn't be blind, but be the result of deep, thoughtful reasoning. I agree with most of your points, I have agreed all my life, but lately, I've been thinking: can caution hurt us? How will we know if we have found the one God has chosen for us if we don't TRY? The movies, media, American CULTURE itself teaches us that there is such a thing as "love at first sight", as love that is impassioned, fiery, resilient. Do you think Christians are LOSING something by being so cautionary. I know our first priority is supposed to be God. But, is such hesitation, such caution, truly what God wants for us? He made us human, all too human, with faults and passions. Would He understand? Is it better to have loved and lost, then to never have loved at all? I'm interested to hear what you think!?
hmm im just replying to CMK's comment. Um the thing is if u look over the actual post, it never says to avoid a relationship totally. It says to think it over. You have to use Prayer as a way for your decisions. If you do beielve in the presence of God, then you should trust that he knows what is best for you. So every relationship needs to be entered in with a great deal of prayer. If you feel God gives you the goahead. then goahead.
From being in a relationship I have to say that if one does decide to go into a relationship the two should sit down and discuss boundaries. And just saying we're not gonna have sex is not a boundary. Such a definition is too vague, and will crumble in the time of temptation. This boundary should be something you can write down, it doesn't have to be overly specific, but it shouldn't be too vague.
Im currently reading Sex and the Supremacy of Christ. An online version of the book can be found at the link below
http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/OnlineBooks/ByTitle/2398_Sex_and_the_Supremacy_of_Christ/
Also remember that a relationship should bring us closer to God and not draw us away.
Honestly, I completely agree with what's being said here because it's SO TRUE! I'm just happy to see that there are still people that feel this way about relationships.
I think it's so true that we should be looking at future aspects when considering relationships! I'm glad that others agree :]
Praise the Lord!
on point Reny, especially be grounded in your word with this topic
1 cor chpt 3, 6-7
2 chor 6:12-18
even mat 19 a little in the beginning
and eph 4 and 5 are good
Phil 4
u kno
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